Homeless in Their Homeland

In my final year of university, one of my classes focused on J. Edward Chamberlin’s, If This is Your Land, Where are Your Stories? A synopsis can be found here.

The title definitely spoke to my experiences and my life as a whole. I delved into my family history for one of my writing assignments in this class. Learning about my family (particularly from my mother’s side) has given more meaning to my life and I can honestly say that my ancestors walk with me every day. 

Here's the (shortened) piece:

      The line, “homeless in their homeland” illustrates the reasons of my existence and I wonder if others feel the same way. My family is my home and they have lived this line throughout their lives. Their experience as the first people on the land to losing this land and their language has transcended into me. Upon exploring their past I have been able to understand my present and the conflicts I face on a daily basis while attempting to find common ground as a First Nations woman living in a Western society.

   These people are my thrice-great grandparents, Samuel Kitchigekek and Cecile Chawanassigekwe to my grandparent, Lilian Kitchikekek (Kitchikeg) all hailing from my mother’s side. Each generation has significant importance to me as they have experienced themes currently defining my life.

 Cecile, a Potowatomi from Wisconsin, migrated to Manitloulin Island and became a member of the South Bay band, where Samuel was from. The band travelled each year to harvest and during a harvest in 1862, a treaty for Manitoulin was instituted. Unfortunately, the band missed the signing and was not granted any of their land. My family’s lifestyle was changed, as they had no rights to their land. Having no rights meant they were homeless in their homeland.

 Less than 100 years later, the same story continued to affect my family. This is seen with my great grandfather, Edward Kitchigekek (1891-1964), who was removed from the South Bay band by the ‘Indian office’ because he left the reserve to make a living for his family. Edward left because white settlers were moving onto the band’s land and he could no longer cut pulpwood, a source of income. He and five other families were being forced out of their own home.

 In a broader perspective, the historic and political changes during this time affected my family in the most important way – changing their home and their lives. Treaty signings were meant to designate land, at the same time, the 1862 Manitoulin Island Treaty was meant to take away land. The 1862 treaty preceded the previous treaty of 1836, which designated all of Manitoulin Island as reserve land. Additionally, this same treaty left no land for the South Bay band as they were missed and thought to have not existed by the Department of Indian and Northern Affairs.

 Over 100 years after the 1862 treaty, the Department of Indian and Northern Affairs finally granted the band land. They were amalgamated with Wikwemikong, an unceded territory of Manitoulin Island. My people could now lead their lives, only in terms of where the government allowed them to do so. In earlier times, my people could not even live on their own land, they were forced to roam their homelands.

 My great-great grandfather, Gabriel Kitchigekek (1856-1929) and grandmother, Lillian Kitchikeg (1932-1970) also brought me to this time and place for two different reasons. Gabriel was known for being a medicine man and it is remembered by the community that many people travelled to see him. Lillian attended residential school at St. Joseph’s Spanish Indian Residential School where Basil H. Johnston remembers her in his book, Indian School Days. Gabriel and Lillian are a mirror of the two most important things in my life: culture and education. I am not arguing residential school was a positive experience, but the themes in their lives, are still prevalent in mine.

 The themes of land, language and education are who I am today. I believe these themes will continue to not only exist throughout my life, but in the lives of my children. At times I try to grab from education to take the place of being away from my land and not being able to speak the language of my ancestors, but it’s only a fraction of me. As a result, at times I feel homeless, but I find comfort in knowing where my home is, it’s in the survival of my family and my people. It is with this knowledge of why I have arrived here, that I can now understand where I am going. I am going home. 

Oh hey 2012.

I just want to say:

Today is for today and tomorrow is waiting for you to make today worth it - Me, myself and I.


On another note, I finally have a keyboard! I can actually type and do STUFF - lots of stuff - on my MacBook again.

ATTAWAPISKAT.

What's it mean to you?

Someone Special

Adele.

An amazing female that could take on the world. Now, she's taking on heaven while watching over her family and friends.

It's been 4 years since you were taken away so suddenly, but when I think of those 1,400 and some days, it doesn't seem like that at all. It feels like yesterday.

I miss you babygirl.

A New Year in T-Minus 6 Weeks

Can you believe it? A fellow tweeter posted that, asking if their followers were making plans for 2012.

SHIT, I'm still trying to deal with 2011! Is it a lost cause - should I just move on to 2012?

A lot - and I mean a lot has happened in the last while. I've been MIA moving on with life, and dealing with some self-induced pain (dwelling and over-thinking too things). At the exact time, I feel growth and renewal. It's been a roller coaster for my emotional, physical and mental well-being to say the least.

But, I'm here.

Have you ever gone through a wicked set of emotions, flashbacks, regrets, worries? I've been handling this as best as my little soul can - but it's going to take some time. There are better things ahead for me.

My list of personal needs I'm using to get through this time:

• Forgive myself for my past mistakes and subsequent regrets
• Listen and be open to what I am supposed to learn each day
• Continue to take up new activities and living a healthy life (this is one thing I have absolute complete control over)
• Mind control - improve it and use it - get rid of unhealthy worries and negativity. 
• Dream and continue to dream - keep the thirst in my mind alive. 
• Talk it out. 

Sincerely,
Neech.

Hand me some TP as in TeePee

We all know the Native appropriation craze is alive and well. And it looks like it's here to stay for the fall.

What has caught my attention lately though are the Native appropriations that stretch beyond the short-life of fashion. This happens to be teepees.  


Some of these appropriations are from people who (seem to):

1. Want to pay homage to the romanticized Native American Indian
2. Want to be cool
3. Want to take what they can, use it and then dispose of it

I came across a few of these in the recent weeks and thought I'd share with you all:

1. Want to pay homage to the romanticized Native American Indian

This blogger is an artist who is going to be living in a teepee for the next 5 weeks. This blogger seems to truly be a optimist-hippy sort of being and then they said this:

93. I used to pretend I was a Native American when I was 8.

94. I own a tipi now.

 The teepee also has plywood flooring.. plywood flooring is enchanting, indeed. 

2.  Want to be cool.

This blogger moved to California and decided (?) to live in a teepee (only on a short term basis though) and has posted a photo of themselves in the teepee, photos of the teepees and a list of things they've learned while in a teepee. They also quote that they live in a teepee in their Twitter bio and the reaction they receive when they tell people. All I can say is that it's good you've learned something from the totally-way-cool teepees. 

3.  Want to take what they can, use it and then dispose of it.

This is the most brutalist type of all, in my opinion. I found this photo from a fellow tweeter. So thank you. She says, "This teepee is facing south and was put up by drunken white males....How disrespectful can you get!!! SERIOUSLY". 

I felt disgusted when I saw this photo, even without the caption provided. But to have a teepee facing the south, really? Teepees customarily face the east for several reasons. 

Moreover, apparently the teepee is too teepee-ish for these men as they have the shade canopy. The shade canopy adds insult to injury because the teepee merely becomes a token (although I'd much rather have them drinking infinite yards away from the teepee). 

But what can I say? 

I live in a high rise apartment in the downtown core of a large city. I guess I am culturally appropriating the Western culture. 

NOTE: 

I made a choice not to post their names or blogs. However, I thought to myself, it seems pretty rude to rant about their doings where I could be educating them instead. On the flip-side, they shared their thoughts and choices with the public domain, and so shall I. 

Neech.

What Do You Do?

When you see this?

Over Labour Day weekend I went out to the Kawartha Lakes to spend the weekend with my partner and his friends. 

This is what greeted us at the door.

Can't guess what's in his hands? A pile of sushi? Firecrackers? Licorice? It's cigars. 

Sioux Lookout & Thunder Bay

I wasn't blogging between my purse search and now because I recently traveled up north (Thunder Bay and Sioux Lookout) for work. I normally don't talk about what I do, especially work, until after I've done it.

The trip was amazing, perception-changing and exactly what I needed.

I am so grateful for the work I am involved in and what I've been able to work on and who I have been working with. I love my job and because I love it so much, I will keep it for as long as I can.

I find that people can benefit from being placed into a situation that is not the norm for them, take us out of daily routines and/or shows us just how much is out there.

I woke up mid-morning, later than I have been able to since I can remember. I woke up without an agenda. I woke up feeling refreshed, without a roaring alarm clock by my side.

It felt great. 

Y'know how I said I was on the way to change, yesterday I took a jaunt to the local bookstore and literally found a book and more so the title of the book, that was and is something I need in my life. I'm not going to reveal the title or set any expectations I want from reading it. I'm just going to read it. 

 And no, it wasn't in the self-help section.

Fall Fashion or Fail Fashion...?

I recently sent my most used purse for repair. I won't have it back in my hands for 6-8 weeks and I'm pretty sure it's only been 2 weeks since I've sent it out... So, I need something in the interim.

Since it's a new season - it a good time for a new purse (or two). I tend to purchase a nice purse and an every day purse that takes the wear and tear of my life. I'm honestly at a loss for where to start, but I know I need a purse that is:

1. Large
2. Fall colours, including a deep palette of other colours (i.e. purple, blue)
3. Can be worn as a cross-body or shoulder purse
4. Will match a beige fall coat and red winter coat
5. Not a purse bombarded with a logo or too much print

I still haven't purchased a Native inspired print.. it feels weird, honestly. I mean why am I buying a Native inspired piece when I can just buy Native. That's like buying a Coach inspired purse, just buy Coach.

It's that time again, time to shop... The time I dislike.

I Try

I was given some long due teachings and I have had a hard time following them... but I am trying.

1. Let go of the events that happened in the past - take the teachings and move on
2. Ask for guidance and what I am supposed to learn today
3. I need to start doing things on my own as I enter into a new phase of my life
4. Saying and doing are two completely different things

These words have transcended a new thinking pattern, perception and outlook in my life. I am trying to keep these teachings at the forefront of my mind. I am making small, yet importance steps. I just have to keep going.

These teachings are of the utmost importance because the stress I have caused myself was physically hurting me and I had no idea.

Now, I have to.. Get Real and Get Going.

These Missing Women... & CBC

I recently read an article on CBC, "B.C. forums call for Highway of Tears Amber Alert." The comments were appalling, yet not surprising.

The highway of tears rests in British Columbia (Hwy 16) and is ~700 km of highway where many women have gone missing or have been found murdered... and they continue to disappear.

Comment No. 1
Children reported missing in Canada in 2005(last found information) 66,548 - average of 182 per day.
With 182 Amber alerts a day how long before they become like car alarms - totally ignored?
Person's reported missing in U.S.A. average 2,300 per day.

While there are women missing and let's say a certain number of Amber Alerts were released for the missing women (let's go with 182), does it matter that for every Amber Alert issued, 182 individuals are still missing? I would hope so. I would like to think it does matter.

Moreover, although 182 children are reported missing each day and many of us have become accustomed to recognize and ignore a car alarm (as noted), what kind of alert will raise an alarm? With the number of missing women, apparently too much to call attention to, can we not do anything? Or shall we take comfort in knowing that 2,300 people are reported missing each day in the US?

NB: Guidelines are set for Amber Alerts and the amount issued in an effort to highlight their importance. I am not reviewing Amber Alert guidelines, they have proven to be successful.

Comment No. 2
I"m sorry, but anyone who hitchhikes, takes rides from strangers, or hangs out in the Downtown East Side is just asking for serious trouble.
I'm sorry for your losses, but these people need to take responsibility for their actions.

Commenter No. 2, I am asking that you take responsibility for your actions. Anyone who comments on another person's lifestyle, needs to take into consideration where they themselves are coming from. What is your life like? I gather you don't hitchhike, take rides from strangers or hang out in the Downtown East Side and good for you, you are making a difference in the world. You are not adding yourself to the plethora of people who are asking to be murdered and stolen (or as you call it, "asking for serious trouble"). Actually, what gives me the authority to speak to your words of wisdom? Nothing... But, I had to call you out. Please, let us not only blame the victim here.

Comment No. 3
I cannot even begin to count the number of young first nations we see hitchhiking from one end of west highway 16 to the other, and I am sure anyone who knows this stretch of road will agree.
It never changes,they are always there, and indeed a large number of them are younger girls and even some a bit older.
Females actually seem to out number the males that we see.
Is it not obvious that the message is not getting through?

How about we ask why would someone take (and sometimes kill) a woman instead of blaming the victim yet again? Maybe... just maybe if we supported these families in searching for their lost loved ones, a message would get through to their captures.

I want to point out that although some of the missing women from the Highway of Tears do not completely fulfill Amber Alert requirements, can we remember these same women are still missing regardless of the 'right' alert to be issued?

I respect these families because they have not given up hope and are still trying to find their loved ones. They have the willingness to speak up and do something, so what are you doing?

Healthy is What Healthy Does

So... on my first day of health choices, I ate one Kit-Kat bar, had a mini can of Coke and a bowl of Smart Popcorn mixed with Spicy Chili Doritos. How's that?

Well after the fact, I came across The Nutrition Source from the Harvard School of Public Health. I'm up for just about anything that will assist me in becoming healthy.

As for today, I took the stairs up to my apartment... and yes, my apartment is on a doubled-number floor.

I will do better and I am doing better because yesterday I took the stairs, so take that Kit-Kat bar.

This Time It's Real... and Raw, but Only Brief.

The issue: Feeling frighteningly fat.

Summary:

I'm not a skinny chick - I never was. I was teased, poked fun of and never felt 100% satisfied with my reflection in the mirror. However, I found loopholes on how to fake the sight of an acceptable size. And now, there is no loophole or way to hide. (DUN DUN DUN...!)

Background:

Ever since I can remember, I was enrolled in weekend or after school activities from figure skating, gymnastics, boxing, to karate. None of these lasted throughout the years and at times I wish they had. Of course, there is no barrier against me joining again.

Throughout most years, I was the butch girl who was part of the 'cool' crowd, but not 100% cool because of my weight. I feel my weight caused me to put up a front and unfortunately that front was an insecure mean girl. I'm naturally an introvert and a little shy, which didn't help the case. When I would think about forgetting my weight issues and just 'going with the flow', I would be reminded of big-loud-and-in-your-face girls who others and myself judged (don't get me started on this stereotype).

The time I was most happy with my weight was in highschool (gr. 11/12) and in university (1st year) because by then, being 'thick' was in, albeit everyone around me was blond and skinny. I ventured down south and fancied the guys who liked 'exotic' and thick females. In my mind, I was just a hefty girl from the rez who could like many other Native girls, pass for Filipino, Spanish, or some other light skinned race.

Then I entered into a full time relationship with a man who I am still with today, we've been together for about 4 years now (I think... we never put an official date..opps!). This man is extremely fit. He works out, plays recreational soccer and drinks protein shakes. He's only missing the Tanning from GTL'ing, seriously.

This year and each year prior I have continuously thought: "I wish I was the same weight as least year. My weight wasn't bad if I think about it. I only needed to tone up". I have myself to look to when it comes to the weight I've gained. It wasn't the pop, chips or lack of exercise that made me overweight; it was my choice not to eat healthy or continue workouts I started.

On that note, I am also the product of several diets or exercises that have not worked, but probably could have if I only stuck to it! For example, Turbo Jam, P90X, 10 Minute Trainer (all of which are from the same company), Weight Watchers (never actually started that one!), and a diet pill (I know, not the greatest idea).

Current Situation:

I recently graduated, started a full-time job and moved out on my own in a new city. The perfect conditions for change, right? WRONG. The current condition is all in my head.

I went to a traditional healer who reminded me to think about today. I have an affection and seemingly need to cause myself stress based on worrying about 'what if...' and 'what could have....'. Tomorrow does not exist and yesterday is gone, I need only to take the teachings of yesterday with me.

Recommendations:

Today, I am calling out myself & my insecurities to say "I will do something today to improve and benefit my wellbeing and over all health."

Each day I will make at least one health (not healthy) choice, whether it be the food I consume or the activities I do.

Each day I will tell myself and remind myself that I am amazing the way I am and that I can only improve upon the positive foundation I already have. The reason? I know I can exist and be happy today as I am, but I could be healthier, happier and all for the better... so why not?

I give myself the OK take it day by day, but to remind myself it's worth it if I work at it.

I must write in a journal at least 3x a week about how I'm feeling. Health isn't just physical, it's holistic.

More to come?


PS. I know it has been a long time.

You Win Some, You Completely Lose Some: An Interview with Cultural Appropriation-ers

What's up cultural appropriation-ers! How you doin', feeling good?

First off, a question for our audience: have you heard of cultural appropriation? For those of you who haven't... Let's get started with a simple definition: cultural appropriation is the adoption of some specific elements of one culture by a different cultural group. I would like to add, it is often rooted in little to no education/knowledge and respect of cultural elements and/or a culture.

Let's get going with our interview picture and plus, it may help to really nail this home:
(Almost any picture can be used in lieu of the above)

The Interview:

Q1) So, what does this picture make you feel like? Good? Special? In-the-know of fashion and pop culture? Creative?
Answer from the young wannabe and/or hipster: Um, well, like, my friends all have one and it's fun to party in, I don't even remember this picture being taken (laughs). But, this is what Natives used to do right, I mean well not all the time, but they did it... didn't they? You should see the video of us doing the Native warrior call with it, but then my friend passes out in the video.. so maybe not.

Q2) Do you know what this is, where it came from and why it is important to their culture?
Answer: Who's culture?

Sub Q2) Native American culture...
Answer from the person who is too cool for school, yet not too cool to be like everyone else: You mean Indians? It's their costume, and it's better than being naked all day. I don't care, I just wear it for fun.

Q3) How would you feel is people started to wear Scottish kilts out shopping and partying (in North America)?
Answer from the person who only wears non-offensive cultural appropriation 'stuff': I'd laugh, who would wear a kilt?! I mean really.

Sub Q3) Well, what about the Pope's mitre hat? You know, the one that is simliar to a chess piece. It is a religious appropriation, but still.

Answer from the person who just wants to be accepted: That would be really mean and cruel, and plus it would kind of be weird, you know? Why would you wear something like that, that's just mean.

End of The Interview.

Here I thought Natives/Indians/Indigenous People/Aboriginal People and whatever else is out there were making headway - but, before I get all sappy, we are! It's just a shame we are being posterized, manipulated and mocked in the worst of ways. And that some of these ways receive more attention than the the 'authentic' Native American 'stuff'.

As I sit here with my moccasins on blogging, I wonder, who else is wearing moccasins out there and why?

FYI: A sarcastic, yet real post (I'm hoping). All answers from 'The Interview' are either taken from overheard conversations and taken from blogs, or completely made up. But, both come with a twist of parody and a pinch of hyperbole.

Neech.